Open thread competition
Regular commenter Luke asked today whether it would be possible to have a thread on signposts which did not devolve into a discussion of homosexuality or the inerrancy of the bible. Well, it is an interesting question.
So here is the deal - one thread. Any topic is allowed, but no discussion on homosexuality (including shadow side commentary on pride and haughtiness), and no discussion on inerrancy of the bible, the bible as word of God etc. Any commenter who breaches these guidelines in either substance or intent will be eliminated. It is my pure discretion as to whether a breach has occurred (although, being the contrary sort that I am, I may choose to allow things that amuse me) so I advise you to steer well clear of any gray area. In order to be eligible for the prize, commenters must comment at least five times in a substantive manner (that is, “me too” comments and similar will be discounted at the pure and irrational discretion of the moderators). The moderators are not eligible to win the prize but may participate on the thread.
The rules of this thread do not affect comments on any other thread, but if you forget where you are, then you are GAWN. Eliminated commenters may continue to comment, but will not be eligible for prizes.
The competition will be closed when I announce that it is over. I will not announce that the competition is over while this post remains on the front page of signposts and while at least two people remain in regular discussion on the thread. Or alternatively I will announce the competition is over when it fails spectacularly or when I get sick of it.
The winner will be determined by me at my sole discretion (although I will tolerate input from phil). The winner will be the eligible commenter who shows in this thread to be the best combination of witty, thoughtful, insightful, vulnerable, honest and any other quality I find endearing. The prizewinner or prizewinners (depending on how many people I like) will upon supplying me with a valid mailing address receive the most horrendous collection of kitsch and crap christian trinkets that I can be bothered finding. Notable possibilities include a prayer of jabez g-string or the bumper sticker which phil forced me to remove from the car after just a couple of hours which read “Warning! In the event of rapture, driver may disappear!!”
I miss that bumper sticker.
Anyway, our most commented thread has amassed 497 comments to date so that is something to aim for. Special encouragement for lurkers to make a comment to let us know who you are, where you come from and so on.
Suggested topics - the Latham diaries, global warming, compulsory voting, the NZ elections, the union movement (that one’s for you Alan), practical ideas for mainstream church people to connect with and minister to people unlike them with out being condescending, advance thoughts about the movie Serenity and just about anything you can think of.
Let the games begin!!
September 28th, 2005 at 4:25 pm
The Latham diaries? *yawn* Come on, now THAT is dull…
September 28th, 2005 at 4:33 pm
see how Dan refers to her loving husband - she tolerates input from me!!!!
September 28th, 2005 at 4:47 pm
Yeah, well I am still annoyed at you making me scrape that bumper sticker off. Writing about it just brings it all back.
September 28th, 2005 at 4:47 pm
What do people think of their local Christian radio station?
Whether it be Light FM, Life FM, Sonshine, FM 103.2, 96-five Family, Way FM, Vision FM…one of the Rhemas..or any of the other independent Christian stations across Australia.
What is your honest opinion of the music, the announcers, the teaching programs, the station’s general approach?
For example, years ago, focus groups revealed that Sonshine’s music was considered ‘bland and repetitive’
by listeners…who wanted more ‘rock and roll’.. (resulting in the strange introduction of 60’s rock and roll, which is not what I think the focus groups meant by ‘rock and roll’).
They’ve been on air for close to a couple of decades now in Australia.
How are our Christian stations doing?
September 28th, 2005 at 4:51 pm
I don’t know how qualified I am to comment on this becase I rarely listen to them. When they had a station trial with 777 or whatever it is I remember we used to refer to it as Michael W Smith radio.
However, even though I only ever spin through the Christian stations on my way to somewhere else, I can always pick the christian stations because they seem so cheery - both the announcers and the music. And when I realise what it is I am listening to I kind of have the “aha” experience which explains why the station seems to be populated by cheery chipmunks.
September 28th, 2005 at 4:59 pm
Seriously, Lance?
They’re full of shit.
September 28th, 2005 at 5:00 pm
“I don’t know how qualified I am to comment on this becase I rarely listen to them.”
The only qualification I reckon you need to comment on this thread is to have ever listened to the stations.
September 28th, 2005 at 5:01 pm
“They’re full of shit.”
Feel free to go into specifics.
September 28th, 2005 at 5:10 pm
“And when I realise what it is I am listening to I kind of have the “aha” experience which explains why the station seems to be populated by cheery chipmunks.”
The ‘cheery chipmunk’ sound is especially difficult to achieve at breakfast, when you’ve stayed up to watch Lateline, had 4 hours sleep, and then the alarm goes off at 3:30am….and it takes 4 hits of the snooze button to finally get out of bed…and face another morning of cheery chipmunkness.
Ahhh…memories…
September 28th, 2005 at 5:18 pm
Christian radio stations…
Have invariably banal news and commentary
Play bad music that I wouldn’t listen to any other time, so why would I listen to it just because it’s called “Christian”
Are not funny
And, when ironic, are only ironic by accident…ie by playing bland bubblegum pop that, if you listen to it, oozes values that are nothing like Christian values (as far as I’m concerned). A station down here played some Hilary Duff song over and over and over, and if you listened to the words it was all about getting revenge on an ex, and was just appalling in terms of the views of men and women it constructed. Like, provided it sounds sugary it must be of the Kingdom, right?!
September 28th, 2005 at 5:20 pm
Well, to be specific, I find the music to be utter shite for the most part. 99% of it, at least. The only reason it gets a gig is that’s it’s “Christian”. If it didn;t have a few lines about Jesus and all that, it certainly wouldn;t get a run on quality grounds. Michelle Nordemann? Give me a break.
(To be fair, the above reason also explains why I don’t listen to an awful lot of secular radio stations).
Secondly, the whole notion of a Christian radio station seems flawed to me. Why not have Christians work at a secular one?
Thirdly, the broad-based nature of most Christian “ministries” like that lead them to be incredibly afraid of offending anyone. Consequently they bore the bejesus out of you.
That’ll do for starters.
September 28th, 2005 at 5:22 pm
Errr, and what Bec said. Which is what I said.
September 28th, 2005 at 5:32 pm
Okay, and to add to Lance’s topic re Christian radio, I might also contribute some of the most cringeworthy statements ever made by christians:
A worship leader at a former church - “You might not feel like standing up and singing on a cold morning, but Jesus didn’t want to die on the cross either!!”
Carmen on a live cassette which I pirated off a friend - “People put up their hands when they know the answer! And who here knows the answer!!!” (wild cheers of excitement from the crowd)
And finally, from everyone’s favourite non-prosperity church - “Look over your neighbour’s shoulder and if he still has money in his wallet, you tap him on the shoulder and tell him to put it in the offering bowl that is going to come around again”
September 28th, 2005 at 5:37 pm
Ive got a question. Well, two actually.
Why are christians so mortally afraid of being thought to be seen to be even thinking about offending anyone in public?
But why will they happily gossip about folks and destroy them in secret?
September 28th, 2005 at 5:39 pm
Here in NZ we have 3 streams of Christian radio & they do seem fairly popular, although I don’t personally listen to them:
Radio Rhema- talk back, middle of the road stuff (inc, the “H” word - Hillsongs)
Life FM- for hip young groovers (inc more “H” bombs - United)
Southern Star - for those of you in nursing homes - music to snooze to (featuring- oh, wait for it - “H” instrumentals! - they’re everywhere aaauuuggghhhh!)
Hence my diverse selection of CDs comes in very handy when in the car.
September 28th, 2005 at 5:54 pm
Here are some direct links to Australian Christian radio stations, for a fresh reminder of what they sound like.
FM 103.2 Sydney
mms://202.147.105.45/fm1032
Life FM Adelaide
http://radio.internode.on.net:8042/listen.pls
96five Family FM Brisbane
http://www.96five.com/ (click ‘listen live’)
Sonshine FM Perth
http://sonshinefm.ws/listenlive2.html
Light FM Melbourne
not streaming yet, 89.9 FM
Ultra106five FM Hobart
http://ultra106five.com/ (and click ‘listen live’)
Rhema FM Geelong
http://streaming.powerserve.com.au/rhemafm
Vision FM Australia-wide (mostly small country communities)
http://62.25.96.7/ucbau
September 28th, 2005 at 6:55 pm
And now for something completely different….
I made a new friend recently - an 82 yr old Scottish gent named Jack Grey who used to be a surgeon, then spent some years in the Congo as a missionary before settling in NZ. Twenty years ago he left all institutional churches completely (very radical move at the time) and has lived a very vibrant, “organic” faith ever since.
He has recently set up his own webpage and was very chuffed to have received over 6000 hits just last month! This man’s genuine walk with God just humbled me & I thought that folk here may be encouraged to read some of his blogs and articles: http://www.thepilgrimpath.co.nz/blog.html
He is also featured on a similar American website: http://www.lifestream.org run by a man called Wayne Jacobsen who I have also met & can recommend as a humble guy who truly loves God. You may like to read his online fiction book - Jake Colsen “Why I don’t go to church anymore” - very cool scenario.
Oprah’s book club anybody??? (joking, folks, joking..)
September 28th, 2005 at 10:31 pm
Ahhh… christian radio - it’s chewing gum for the ears.
September 28th, 2005 at 11:37 pm
Dan, you have asked for comments from lurkers, I read signposts daily, but very rarely comment. I like what you and Phil are doing and I enjoy this blog.
Well Lance, Christian radio? I am afraid I haven’t listened in years, for many of the above stated reasons. Though I do remember hearing you read the news on Sonshine FM. I used to tune in on Sunday nights for some teaching programs and interviews and the Sunday Celebration News. I never really listened for the music as it was pretty ‘bland and repetitive’ I much preferred Triple J.
BTW, good idea for a thread Luke, it should prove to be a formidable challenge for Homer and Lance.
September 29th, 2005 at 12:12 am
“Though I do remember hearing you read the news on Sonshine FM.”
That would be from the time before I became a bad-ass dude.
I have been officially outed.
I am mildly ashamed of my former life as a cheery chipmunk….trying to convince people that to be a ‘Christian’….meant being polite and cheerful and family-friendly..(we never really worried about that Christ on the cross dying for sinners stuff.)
September 29th, 2005 at 2:28 am
The message most christian radio stations in my neck of the world is geared toward “church kids”. The meesage seems to have been - be good little boys and girls, don’t do drugs and don’t get pregnant.
September 29th, 2005 at 9:39 am
Welcome Nilmot, thanks for the comment.
Lance is the first person to have qualified for the competition.
Luke, in relation to your question, I think that one of the things that Christian people are incredibly bad at is criticising or challenging people who deserve it, but are perfectly happy to challenge/criticise capable people.
September 29th, 2005 at 9:48 am
“Lance is the first person to have qualified for the competition. ”
I don’t want your Christian trinket crap….nor do I want the postman to think that I’m into that sort of shit.
That’s really gay (and probably proud and haughty too).
Gay gay gay, proud proud proud proud, haughty haughty haughty ….hawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww-tee.
September 29th, 2005 at 10:49 am
Well Lance, now you know what we think of Christian f***ing radio stations.
Now on to Christian TV.
September 29th, 2005 at 11:01 am
I would like to hear what people think of secular music as compared and contrasted to Christian music. It seems to me that I get much more inspired by secular Christian artists than I do by the ones on Christian labels. Bruce Cockburn in particular. I also don’t understand why people like Kurt Cobain, Tom Waits, Peter Himmelman and even Helmet seem to immediately tap into my emotions so easily, when the “Christian” artists just seem to be so alien to me.
I don’t listen to Christian radio at all, the music is very bad, and the preachers seem to all be sharing the same messages for the last thirty years. I do sometimes enjoy talk radio, but mostly I listen to my cd’s
By the way I think being a good steward of the money God has given me requires that I do not purchase Christian cd’s. They always cost more, for bad quality, and I know from experience the artists get almost none of the profits. I think I dishonor God by paying more money for poor quality and perpetuate an injustice to the artists.
the rev
September 29th, 2005 at 11:47 am
“Michael W Smith radio” is good for when I feel like listening to Michael W Smith - I have a hankering for it about once a month otherwise I usually listen to the three ABC AM channels.
My favorite Christian Radio moment happened a few months back when there in Melbourne my wife and I heard Light FM braodcast the winning lotto numbers! What the…?
September 29th, 2005 at 11:54 am
I’m just so disappointed in how bland it all is. This mortal fear of being interesting….it’s amazing to me.
September 29th, 2005 at 12:43 pm
So what do you all think of hetrosexuality? Do you reckon people are born that way?
and the Nicean and Apostle’s Creed … are they really infallible, or where the church leaders who formulated them to define orthodoxy wrong?
Just pushing the envelope :p
September 29th, 2005 at 12:54 pm
How about another oldie, but a goodie…is the world REALLY flat, or is it round like the heretics say?
September 29th, 2005 at 1:20 pm
Okay, Lance. You are entitled to self-exclude from the competition. It is just like the casino that way. But continue to participate in the thread.
Rev, I agree with you about secular music - somewhere on this site I have posted the track listing of a couple of mix CDs I have made of non christian christian music - stuff that talks about meaning and engagement etc but which isn’t christian.
I find christian music pretty twee and often derivative pop music. The only christian music I ever enjoyed was a tape I got from Belgrave Heights convention of christian thrash band “the Hush Puppies” singing immortal hits such as “that t-shirt won’t save you” and “Amy Grant is my sister”.