2007 anyone?
Okay this is the predictions thread. The celebrity death match concept is far too narrow. So make your predictions for 2007 - local, global, celebrity whatever floats your boat. Predictions close on 15 January 2007 and any serious predictions that actually come true will be suitably acknowledged during the year.
January 1st, 2007 at 7:35 pm
Celebrity death match - is that where we guess who will die during the year, or is there a fight to the death between celebrities? (maybe I missed this)
Last year was the year that the nation and the world realised the severity of global environmental issues a lot more than before (the green conversion of Murdoch in October was quite interesting). These new revelations about our world will shape 07 to some degree.
Likewise, I expect the current emerging trends in the Church to continue (broadening theology, increasing emphasis on wealth/poverty issues, and the misional revolution).
As you can see, I’m not visionary enough to predict any new trends, but I’m guessing people like Lance who’ve seen more years go by than I will have some ideas.
Things like widespread electric cars and big mergers/partnerships in the Christian world can probably be saved for 2008, but there are people working on them now.
January 2nd, 2007 at 12:41 am
Signposts must be on the cutting edge. A Michigan University has compiled a list of 16 banned words for 2007 - Awesome and Truthiness made the list. Amazing!!!
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16421726/
Lake Superior State University’s 2006 list of words banished “for mis-use, over-use and general uselessness”:
— Gitmo
— Combined celebrity names
— Awesome
— Gone or went missing
— Pwn or pwned, a misspelling of “own” used by online video gamers
— Now playing in theaters
— We’re pregnant
— Undocumented alien
— Armed robbery gone bad or drug deal gone bad
— Truthiness
— Ask your doctor
— Chipotle
— i-anything
— Search
— Healthy food
— Boasts
January 2nd, 2007 at 2:21 pm
A continued rise in Islamophobia and anti-Muslim sentiment. I think that there will be ongoing instability in Iraq, and continued terrorist activity elsewhere, probably by similar interest groups.
The level of interest in Australian immigration policy, esp. detention centres, will continue to drop.
Ongoing instability in Melanesia, which might occasionally hit the headlines, coupled with increased resistance against Australia’s present approach to dealing with such instability. I hope that this will be associated with increased funding of and attention to community development in the Pacific.
Continued commodification of activism, especially via campaigns like Make Poverty History, but this will be associated with a rise in radical approaches to making poverty history, ie. the Make Affluence History campaign. I think that the anti-consumerist (or whatever you want to call it) approaches are becoming more popular, and there’s the emergence of really interesting forms of resistance, ie freeganism.
The issue of the status and rights of indigenous people in Australia, and reconciliation, will remain pretty much off the agenda and out of the limelight unless there’s something sufficiently scandalous to make the front pages of the national paperes.
Oh dear, I am negative today.
January 2nd, 2007 at 5:22 pm
I have a new project underway for 2007.
Well, really it was birthed on Australia Day last year.
It was a few hours before the Skyshow fireworks display in Perth, and hundreds of thousands of people were making their way to the Swan River foreshore to watch the fireworks synchronised with the lame and unimaginative soundtrack broadcast by Mix 94.5.
On the train into the city, teenagers were throwing around beach balls, flicking people with towels, while making sure no-one flogged their grog.
On Barrack St, hyped teenagers and young men would randomly yell ‘blahhh!’ in my face, or lean out car windows and yell various things.
Later in the day, a Police officer would be caught on video, delivering a few solid punches to someone who was restrained on the ground.
I realised then and there, it was not Australia Day we were celebrating, but Dickhead Day.
A day when all the dickheads of Australia could be free to be the dickheads they are..
So it gave me the idea to start the Dickhead Day awards, mirroring the Australia Day Honours.
And just like the Golden Raspberries are announced prior to the Academy Awards (if Ted Haggard doesn’t get Worst Supporting Actor for Jesus Camp this year, it’s going to be hard to take the Razzies seriously) Australia’s first Dickhead Day Awards will be announced on January 25, 2008.
Nominations are invited throughout 2007 recognising ongoing contributions of dickheadedness to the Australian community.
The awards are not so much about individual acts of dickheadedry, but a recognition of the lives dedicated to making Australia more stupid, in the fields of the arts, religion, community and public services, and of course politics.
And like the Australia Day awards, special Dickhead Day honours will be considered for Police and military service.
For example, eligible for nomination for a Dickhead Day award would be Jamie Fawcett, in recognition for his ongoing services to the arts.
http://www.news.com.au/entertainment/story/0,23663,21001192-10388,00.html
Particularly noteworthy acts of dickheadedness in a particular year are not necessarily a prerequisite for the bestowing of the honour. For example Wilson Tuckey, Peter Hoare, Pat Mesiti etc would be considered for their lifetime achievements as dickheads.
And like the Australia Day awards, remember, there are many quiet achiever dickheads in the community who none of us may know, but who deserve to be recognised.
All dickhead award winners will be eligible for 2007 Dickhead of the Year.
January 2nd, 2007 at 5:28 pm
I have this theory, unproven as it is, that when the entire world seem to be “dickheads”, generally the problem is me.
Must be awfully lonely in LanceLand sometimes.
January 2nd, 2007 at 6:31 pm
“when the entire world seem to be “dickheads”
Nope, can’t recall saying that anywhere.
But it’s heading in that direction, with CCC leading the way on behalf of the church in Australia.
January 2nd, 2007 at 6:49 pm
“Must be awfully lonely in LanceLand sometimes.”
Well, that one was straight out of the CCC School of Pastoral Care Management.
Got any other great outreach icebreakers?
You’re a shoddy little cult and you don’t like people exposing it for what it is.
January 2nd, 2007 at 7:08 pm
It’s ok Lance. If you don’t like it, just don’t go. I’m sure you’ll find somewhere you like sooner or later.
January 2nd, 2007 at 8:49 pm
what is your go silent bob - you just can’t remain true to your name can you? If you don;t aggre with lances posts - argue the point don;t try and be trhe first winner of a dickhead award.
January 2nd, 2007 at 8:54 pm
My predictin of 2007 is that CCC and HS will continue to do the stupidest things and sponsor the wackiest people to come and speak truthiness to our ustralian church - pople like Benny Hinn and that nob from Africa -
John Howard will not say sorry and will lose the next election
Labor in NSW will win again
January 2nd, 2007 at 8:58 pm
Happy New Year to all!
January 3rd, 2007 at 7:16 am
I know I am dreaming for this one but for 2007I would like to see every mega church to start actually giving of their money to churches in the third world. Not just small amounts but actuall amounts these churches could use. Can you imagine if every mega church gave at least million dollars, not just once off but every year to a church in a third world county.
Now consider tha there is at least 1210 mega churches (over 2000 memebers) in the USA and there more and more reaching that figure here in Australia what a real difference that could make in 2007
From a recent study into mega churches in the USA.
(In terms of financial health, the megachurches in this study appear on the surface to be better off than 5 years ago. The average income received from all sources for the last fiscal year was approximately 6 million dollars. This is a significant increase compared to the 1999-2000 study results, even adjusting for inflation. The average expenditures for the congregations also increased to 5.6 million dollars. This reflects almost the exact same ratio between income and expenses as the 1999-2000 data. It is worth noting that given this average income for the approximately 1,200 megachurches in the U.S. would mean that the combined income from all these congregations is roughly 7.2 billion dollars a year.)
http://hirr.hartsem.edu/megachurch/megastoday2005_summaryreport.html
January 3rd, 2007 at 8:13 am
January 3rd, 2007 at 9:16 pm
LOL now your trying to be funnier than I am SB and that is not allowed
January 4th, 2007 at 8:23 am
It was worth a shot!!! :-p
January 4th, 2007 at 10:13 am
SB I was watching ACC last night (Australian Christian Channel for all of those who don;t have foxtel or Austar) and I watched about 5 minutes of Phil Pringle and the line that really got me was abuot corection - I had to laugh - he was telling people about other people who from time to time come to him and tell him that God has brought them to Phil to correct him -he charecterised these people as having cigarette packets sitting in their top pockets and did a voice that made them sound like drug-%#&@*#-idiots.
His next line was this and directed at his congregation - “Your not here to correct me - I’m here to correct you! God will correct me if I need it”
January 4th, 2007 at 11:39 am
oh. my. goodness.
That is so completely and utterly disturbing, tragic, depressing…
On one level it makes me angry. On another I feel incredibly sorry for him. The man may live like this forever, if he’s lucky. Chances are, with attitudes like that, he’ll crash and burn at some point.
January 4th, 2007 at 10:31 pm
My prediction is that John Howard will not say sorry and WILL win the next election… but that it will be close. Peter Costello will look really unimpressed by his token or absent acknowledgement in Howard’s victory speech.
Australia will have a half-hearted nuclear debate and decide not to pursue nuclear power.
Australia will have a half-hearted debate about genetically modified foods, and will approve them… then deeply regret this in around 2030 when natural foods become fashionable and and have three times the market value of genetically modified foods.
We will all become more conscious of the Middle East as the fallout from the Iraq invasion influences Western politics for the next few years.
Hillsong will make a few minor headlines.
The emerging church will become more prominent as membership of mainline denominations will continue to decline.
Kidman and Urban will separate.
Pitt and Jolie will adopt.
Bindi Irwin will be flavour of the year… or two… and will crash and burn some time.
More and more Australian business and industries will outsource overseas.
Lance and Silent Bob will both change a little in a good way, but won’t exactly pick out curtains together… while Homer will remain like the Lord Himself… unchanging… we can all look forward to more references from Romans and Corinthians. Saint will make an appearance and behave himself. Bec will blog less in her happily married state. Assorted Hillsongers and CCC attendees will visit Signposts and express outrage. Someone will tell the Rev off for swearing.
The DH awards won’t take off, because they’re just not as funny as the Darwin awards.
January 5th, 2007 at 12:46 am
At the moment, it looks like Howard will win again. He’s too good at elections.
If Labor wins the lower house narrowly, the Coalition will still have balance of power in the Senate. If Labor win by a large margin, Family First will have BoP in the Senate! Given that is is the best possible result either for Labor or FF, does it seem possible that they’ll back each other a little bit?
January 5th, 2007 at 3:10 pm
As we reflect upon the great year that 2007 was, we recall that the Australian Cricket Team followed up their emphatic Ashes win by winning 90% of the 1-dayers they played. Matthew Haydn received a MOTM award for the 20/20 game on Jan 9.
In AFL, WCE continued their dominance with a 2nd consecutive flag. Other movers were Freo who finished 2nd. Matthew Pavlich was the 3rd ranked player in the 07 Brownlow.
Carlton & Essendon finished 15th & 16th between them, and nobody west of Torrens gave a fig about Saint Kilda, Richmond or Hawthawn.
The price of oil continued to rise, with people getting very excited when unleaded petrol crashed to $1:33/litre for 3wks in July. It spiked nicely to over $1:50/litre in Metro WA by October.
Toddy received several kudos throughout the past 12 months for his un-nerving capacity to predict innane stuff.
SB & Lance moved in together and picked curtains with ‘Toddy’ written on them to celebrate and commemorate such a feat.
Toddy tried for a smiley face to keep the vibe light. (not funny, but better for you!)
January 8th, 2007 at 9:19 am
Scott and I have decided to jump on the bandwagon and make a number of predictions for 2007.
1. Someone will prove the power of “prayermail”
2. A trendy new range of fundraising fridge magnets will tip the balance in winning the war in Iraq.
3. The Dream Team will involve themselves in a sex scandal and become known as the “wet dream team”.
4. Dan and Phil will have a baby and they will name him Frodo.
5. Australia will have the highest rainfall on record, and everyone will be bitching about the weather within 2 months.
6. A row will erupt between medical practitioners and animal liberationists when the spleen of an endangered species is found to hold the cure for cancer.
7. The Queen, determined to prevent Camilla from taking her place, will announce the dissolution of the British monarchy.
8. Bush will liberate Cuba, following the death of Castro, for a morale boosting victory.
9. Pauline Hanson will be romantically linked with Geoff from the Wiggles, boosting her profile with the under-six demographic.
10. Laura and Scott will become the stars of an award winning reality tv show.
January 8th, 2007 at 3:03 pm
called Laurascottnoideaofhowtopredictthefuture
January 8th, 2007 at 3:40 pm
Just you wait until our predictions start coming true. Then we’ll see who becomes renowned as expert reality tv psychics.
January 8th, 2007 at 4:18 pm
just you wait greg the explorer just you wait
Just you wait greg the explorer, just you wait! You’ll be sorry, but your tears’ll be too late!
You’ll be broke and Luara and Scott’l have money.
Will they help you? Don’t be funny.
Just you wait, greg the explorer, just you wait!…
Then they’ll march you, Greg the explorer to the wall
And Homer will tell me: ‘Liza, sound the call.’
As they raise their rifles higher, I’ll shout ‘it’s not revenge, it’s only justuce cause genesis commands us to!’
Oh-ho-ho, Greg the explorer, Down you’ll go, gregthe explorer.
Just you wait!
January 8th, 2007 at 4:36 pm
lmao.
Thanks a lot. I’m sure we’ll both be humming that all evening now!
I didn’t mean to upset you, poor Greg the explorer. How would you like a guest spot on our reality tv show? Or in a ‘my fair lady’ production, perhaps?
January 8th, 2007 at 4:52 pm
I actually did play the role of Zoltan Carpathy - that oily Hungarian, in a production of My Fair Lady in Port Macqaarie in 1996. I also played Bill Sykes in Oliver the year before that - I would be an aset to your reality show - lending it some much needed artistic legitimacy
January 9th, 2007 at 7:43 am
Pat Robertson is way ahead of you all.God has spoken to him( http://news.monstersandcritics.com/usa/news/printer_1239284.php)and told him that in 2007 there will be a terrorist attack in the USA resulting in mass killings.And Pat is not a man to be dismissed;in 2006 he forecast hurricanes in the Philippines.According to his website all this is due to his ability to leg press 2000 pounds “well above the world record” and is due not only to God but to an energy shake he promotes!Come on Greg,Janet,Phil if we are to take seriously your predictions tell us about your leg presses!
January 9th, 2007 at 8:29 am
A hurricane in the Philippines? Who would have thought? That never happens!!!!
I predict a hurricane, a drought, and an earthquake somewhere… that lots of people will get shot in the United States (because every year thousands do)… that Iraq will be a bloodbath… I really can’t do leg presses, but hey, for these kinds of predictions, I don’t need to.
January 9th, 2007 at 8:35 am
I predict Homer will make little or no sense to us in 2007 and it will be a result of our non existent knowledge of scripture.
I predict Lance will get an interview with Brian Houston and will show up with a microphone that is really a gun that shoots poisoned kool aid, Brian Houston will be miraculously healed and become even a bigger star with more money than bill Gates and Lance will laugh at the irony of it.
I predict Greg will make lame jokes that no one laughs at but himself.
I predict Bec will get in an arguement with Gandhi (being channelled by recent new age convert Britney Spears) regarding the place of women in the peace movement.
I predict Dan and Phil will be murdered by an elite hit squad from a secretive society called Brian Dei
I predict Lionfish will start giving ten percent of his income to his church saying, “well it seemed like the most logical amount”
I predict Alan Hirsch will author a new book about church planting called invitro church
I predict alan will try and leg press 2,000 lbs and will die of compound fractures to every joint in his body.
I predict Reve will revisit the cave and red west and will decide to move to melboure and join us, but then will get in an arguement about the footy with chopper read and in self defense kill chopper, winding up in prison for ten years at which point a self authored book about his life on the mean streats of Sydney will be written, made into a movie and a reve rap album will be realeased
I predict Silent bob will actually speak, and will say something so profound that everyone will wonder why he doesn’t talk more.
I predict that I will go to planet shakers, and seriously injur seventeen young people in the worship pit, and at the trial I will declare that I was overcome by the Spirit, in which case the Spirit will be tried as an accessory to assault found guilty and placed in prison with me, which will result in wide spread revival amonst the prisoners and I will write an autobiograghy called, the God mosher.
rev
January 9th, 2007 at 11:31 am
I have been thinking about the Cave & Melbourne actually, continuously since October.
Here’s my predictions:-
1. Someone in the Melbourne media will recognise the Rev’s larger-than-life charisma & marketablity & he will become a “christian celebrity” of a different type in VIC & later the whole of Australia. Speaking engagements will cause him to spend more & more time away from the Cave, which is growing, causing him to consider deputising a caretaking Pastor for it. This will cause him some dystress & confusion as the Holy Spirit guides him to the right person.
2. More & more young ppl from CCC & HS will start asking questions & contacting Signposts after googling keywords. Personal relationships will be forged as the informal counselling offered by regular Signposters causes growth in these seekers.
3. There will be a revolutionary backlash against conservative prosperity teaching even in the Pente Mega-Churches. Young people en-masse are going to become mission-minded & desire to identify with society’s disposessed. They will take their lead from people in the Melbourne missional community.
4. Several Signposters will covertly insert copies of Tanya Levin’s “People in Glass Houses” (Allen & Unwin, due 1st March) into the book stores at CCC & HS in an act of mischevious yet passive anarchy.
5. Originating on university campusses, then becoming widespread, an org called “I hate Hillsong” will spring up & protests will occur outside Hillsong campusses. A website http://www.ihatehillsong.org.au will be created, recieve millions of hits & will rival Signposts for online dissidents. The org will be created by someone who figured significantly in the Hillsong power network.
6. There will be some uncomplimentary mention of Hillsong during the 2007 G&L Mardi Gras next month.
7. Kevin Rudd will become Prime Minister, but many will discover he is not a simple man at all. There will be many contradictions & confusion about his alliances. Julia Gilard as deputy will be lampooned by cartoonists & comedy sketchers more than any previous Australian politician.
8. The economy will have to adapt as more & more people downsize or rightsize their life balances, choosing simpler, less-stressful vocations & relationships, prioritising spirituality & community above all else. This will be painful & confusing for the Christian Capitalists whom have spent years doing the opposite & now find themselves out of vogue.