Comments on: NT for Lent 21 - 1 Peter 3

By: Emma Whale

Emma Whale — Sat, 17 Mar 2007 09:31:36 +0000

I read that same book, and I find it’s very true! Most of the happily married people I know would say, “Oh, yes I believe in submission, but…” and when it comes down to the nuts and bolts of it they really only ever submit to each other, not the wife to the husband. I find this passage hard, because marriage is a partnership, surely? Another friend once said too that the position of women in the Bible basically started as nothing in the beginning (after the fall) but gradually gets better and better as we go along…so maybe there’s an argument that we’re still in the process of getting to our ultimate goal, which is true equality and submission to one another, regardless of sex, in love.

By: Janet

Janet — Fri, 16 Mar 2007 22:31:45 +0000

I think it’s a bit to do with confusing a general principle with a “promise”.

As a general principle, “purity and reverence of your lives” is far more winsome for Christ than nagging and badgering. But there’s no guarantees that a life of goodness will lead someone to faith if they’re just not interested.

I think any church that dares to teach “submission of wives” (and I know some that do) are obliged to teach when wives should NOT submit. Women have died as a result of physical abuse, having been “counselled” by pastors to keep loving their abusive spouse, so the spouse will change. What crap. Just means they keep getting away with it.

Although I think that submission of wives is probably analogous to submission of slaves to their masters (important for sheer survival in the 1st century, not so relevant today!) reading the rather lowbrow “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” gave me pause for thought. It was arguing most men feel the need to feel competent… most women feel the need to be loved. It made me think although Christians should avoid legalism in all its forms, perhaps the best way to bless most men is to say “I trust you to make this decision” (I believe you are competent), while the best way to bless most women is to express love (I really adore you). Maybe Paul was on to something…

Still, I remember reading someone who researched this found most happy marriages that claimed they believed in submission of wives were actually egalitarian in practice!

By: Grace Required

Grace Required — Fri, 16 Mar 2007 10:44:37 +0000

Yes Dan
And what of those desparately unhappy wives who try to be more and more submissive to a husband who uses this passage to induce guilt in his wife and uses it as a means of control and a defence against abuse. And those in the church who don’t defend an abused wife because they say “just be submissive and you will win him over and be blessed by staying because God hates divorce”.

By: dan

dan — Thu, 15 Mar 2007 22:54:46 +0000

I remember years ago being at an internal spiritual retreat and watching a lovely lady who had a non-Christian husband burst into tears about this passage - about all the times that she had tried to be submissive to her husband to help him to become Christian as the bible says to. In doing so she had been desperately unhappy and it had not had any effect towards changing his beliefs and she was distraught.